Entry Submitted by John at 11:22 PM EDT on April 25, 2017
First of all, allow me to commend you. Forgiveness truly is a simple process but, there are times when it's anything but "easy." I believe that's true, in part because of an association we make between being able to forget something that someone did and, remembering it but, not counting it against them. Remembering causes us to also remember the pain or, other ill effect their actions may have had on us and, thereby making it that much more difficult to not hold their actions against them so, bless you for reaching that point where you were able to, as you said, become "neutral" toward him.
I know that some, if not most of what I'm saying, you're already familiar with but, I just felt compelled to express my gratitude that you put yourself out here as an example to the rest of us, to get serious about the way we're to be as people who "walk in the light." We all come to God's banquet table at different places in our lives and, we view Him according to our personal relationship with Him. I'm hesitant to quote a bunch of scripture sometimes, because it's not my desire to come across as though I'm saying "look at me and how much I know" but, what I know is what I know and I make no apologies for that. I say that, simply to say that as I've studied and learned, we're called to love people, not necessarily to "like them and, it took me a long time to get to a point in my life where I was able to understand how that's even possible. What I learned was, as we each, individually have a relationship with God, we learn to exercise an ability to give the offenses, others may commit against us, over to God...which is kind of like allowing God to help us unload our baggage and thereby, lighten our load. He said, we're to "cast all our cares on him because, he cares for us." I heard a guy say once, "It's not the mountain ahead of you that wears you down, it's the little grains of sand in your shoe." Un-forgiveness can act as those grains of sand in our shoe...every now and then, it's just a good idea to stomp along side the trail, take our shoes off and, empty them. Again, thank you for sharing your testimony.